• {{Dac: Are you being gay tonight and going somewhere else, or are you going to come over here and Smash like a man?
  {{Jim: Sounds like I’m smashing a man.
  {{Jim: It’s with a concrete block, right?
  {{Jim: Got a tarp?
  {{Dac: I’ll take that as a “you’re coming over here tonight.”
  {{Jim: Oooh. I missed “like” in that sentence
  {{Jim: Still, got a tarp?
  {{Dac: ….yes Jim. I have a tarp.
  {{Jim: Excellent!

• {{GX: I’ll have to watch later. According to my e-mail, I can meet local singles.
  {{Jim: You sure can. All you have to do is go to the brothel. ^_^
  {{GX: Naw, that closed right after people realized that the internet.

• Jim: You know how me and Ryan switched off driving? It’s kind of like the 24 Hours of Le Mans except it was the 2 Hours of Ohio.

• {{Jim: Well, you know what they say.
  {{Jim: When the cat gets sassy, it might be gassy.
  {{Marcus: You are a fountain of bullshit.
  {{Jim: I do my best.
  {{Marcus: I dispute this.
  {{Jim: Well, you know what they say.
  {{Jim: If you dispute, you’re probably a brute.
  {{Marcus: I hate you.
  {{Marcus: Not really.
  {{Marcus: Which is also a lie.
  {{Jim: Well, you know what they say: If you hate Jim, fuck you in the left kidney with a rusty electric razor. ^_^
  {{Marcus: I wonder how many seconds it takes to uninstall Pidgin.

***

• Jim: I’m putting my penis in the vagina of your choice.

***

• Jim: What if you rolled the pizza around the hot dog?
  Ryan: You can’t play God! The position is already taken!

***

• {{GX: Hypo!
  {{Jim: Dermic!